What IS Leadership?

Hi everyone.  This is Brian O’Brien, your business coach, and I’m here to talk to you about coaching and how the process of coaching can literally change your life… as it has mine.

This blog is going to be a little different. A bit more provocative. I’m struggling with something and I’d like your help. I have some questions about leadership.

One of the good things about being 58 years old and traveling as much as I have is that I’ve seen quite a bit. Running a consulting company since 1986 has enabled me to see QUITE a bit. One of the bad things about being in business that long is that you are old enough not just to understand the trends… but to actually be part of the trend.

One of those trends is leadership.

Frankly, I can’t figure “leadership” out. I’ve studied it. I’ve read a zillion books on leadership. I’ve taught leadership everywhere from universities to private companies to the government to non-profits. I’ve read the taxonomies, I’ve read the blogs, I’ve interviewed leaders, I’ve even talked with (heaven forbid) other consultants about what leadership is… I even know what a competency is!!! And I’ve come to one conclusion:

No one really knows what leadership is!! Not really.

They all have their opinions… they all stake their careers on their opinion… and they all have a training program to prove their opinions. But, if that were true… and valid… shouldn’t we be up to our eyeballs in incredible leaders by now???

Is “everyone a leader” as many consultants will have you believe?  If that’s true, why are there so many bad ones? Does leadership have to be developed or is it innate? I don’t know… let’s ask the kid who is the leader in her kindergarten class. Can leadership be trained? Can you actually take someone who is NOT a leader and make them into a real, actual leader? I’m not asking if you can make a leader a better leader… but actually “make” a leader from a “non-leader.” Perhaps a more provocative question might be… if everyone is a leader then why is leadership training needed?

I asked this question of Scott Blanchard during a conference earlier this year… and received a VERY unsatisfactory answer. I believe that there is so much money involved in the care and feeding of leaders that we’ve forgotten to actually know what a leader is. Never mind what a GOOD one is.

So, I need help… how do we arrive at world peace, how do we feed everyone who is hungry… what do we do about systemic crime… what really is leadership… and exactly what color are my wife’s shoes and why doesn’t she think they match that dress??? (Sorry about that last one, but hey, we all have our immediate problems!!)

If you actually know what a leader is… or know of a leader who can articulate what being a leader really is all about… that’s different from what the 500 books at Borders says it is… PLEASE have them contact me… and I’ll report their findings in the next blog.

Thanks and I look forward to hearing from all of you.

Brian

 

The Coaching Process, Part 1

Hi, this is Brian O’Brien again.  Today we’re going to talk about how coach “works”…..what is the coaching process…..even, find out if there IS a coaching process.

It is my opinion that there IS a process to coaching.  However, just like any other endeavor, some people are process people.  Others are not.  Some people find a process in the smallest of activities….others lean more toward going with the flow.

I happen to be one of the “process” people.

Additionally, I believe that many (note here that I’m clearly NOT saying all people…or even most….merely many) people are process oriented as well….and they are comforted by a coach who follows a process as well.

The next question needs to be, however, does following a coaching process mean that the coach is just asking the client a rigid series of question…with no “humanity”?  One of my foundational beliefs is that coaching is all about the client….so, can a process meet the needs of my clients.  Absolutely!!!  The process doesn’t have to be rigid….the process merely has to be fluid…flexible…addressing the directions and movement of the client.  Cool, huh?

So, how do you construct a process which is fluid and doesn’t look like software coding from Microsoft™?  The trick is….establish a reliable and predictable outcome for a series of logical steps.  Anticlimactic, huh?  And, what does it really mean?

Well, first the coach has to understand that another of the principles of coaching is constantly moving the client toward the desired (THEIR desired) outcome.  Therefore, if a goal can be identified and it doesn’t matter what the goal is…that’s an outcome.  But, there are many steps that have to be performed prior to reaching that goal…and each step has an outcome.  But (now hang in there with me on this one!!) the outcome from each previous step is the same as the input to the next step.  Then, as the coach moves the client from one outcome to the next, the coach and the client are following a process.

If the process is predictable….then (now here comes another principle of coaching) that predictable process can be taught.  If it can be taught, it can be learned.  If it can be learned…..then the coach can teach the client, the client can learn the process…and the client can take that learning away from the coaching conversation…and CONTINUE to improve their lives…even AFTER the coaching conversation.

THAT is the beauty of a coaching process; the process can be communicated to the client.  That is the true value of coaching….providing the client with tools to use AFTER the coaching experience.

And, I want to be of tremendous value to my clients….now to you, as well.

Hope this all makes sense to you.  You might have to read it once or twice to get it.  Once you do, I have a gift for you.  If you believe coaching can be a process….sign up for my email list at www.Myriad-PSI.com, send me an email at Brian@Myriad-PSI.com that you have signed up…and I’ll send you a complete MAP of the coaching process that I’ve developed.  We’ll talk more about the exact process during the next blog.

I practice what I preach.  So will you…☺

Have a great holiday and I’ll continue this blog again soon.

Warmly,

Brian

 

What’s in a Coach?

Hi everyone. I’m Brian O’Brien and I’m the new coaching blogger for Smart Company magazine.  Over the next while, I’m going to be talking with you about coaching, what coaching is, what coaching ISN’T, what coaching can do for you, and what it means to be a coach. Coaching is all about conversations and questions. I hope you will feel free to put in your two-cents…because I’m certainly going to share my opinions with you! So, ask anything, comment on anything — and hopefully you’ll contribute to a great coaching conversation.

So, let’s start with what a coach isn’t.

A coach isn’t a therapist. We don’t try to solve all of your problems.  We aren’t psychologists. We aren’t licensed to practice psychiatry…and wouldn’t dare pretend to.  And, while we might be friendly, we aren’t your friend.  Some coaches do become friends with their clients, but typically, we’re not.  We’re also NOT consultants.  We don’t tell you what to do.  We might have a process (I happen to have a GREAT process), but most coaches will follow your lead.

So, if we’re not therapists…we’re not psychologists…we’re not friends…and we’re not consultants…what good are we?

Well, what we are good for is helping you get from point A to point B. We’re good at helping you decide why you are uncomfortable with your life.  Why “things” aren’t working for you lately. We can help you answer the television talk show host question: “How’s that working for you?” We can help you identify what you want. How you can move forward. What’s getting in your way.  What resources do you really have that can aid you in your efforts.  And the part most of us forget — to celebrate the little, everyday victories…in spite of ourselves.

OK, so, now you know generally what a coach is. The next question you might be thinking is, “How do I know if I need a coach?”

That’s the easy part: If you have talked to a friend…however generally…and it was unsatisfactory.  If you have a boss or a subordinate that you are struggling with and the “Dealing with Difficult People” course didn’t get around to this particular person. If you find yourself exhausted…after doing everything right for years! If you don’t remember your kids names, who they are dating, and where you left them last night when you took them to something after school! You are a perfect candidate for a coach!

The good news is that all of this is just the tip of the iceberg.  There are a million questions that still need to be answered about coaching. And I’m here to answer those questions — but I need to know what those questions are. Ask away. That’s what I’m here for.

The next blog will address the question of qualification.  How do you know if the coach you are considering is qualified to work with you?  These, and many more questions, will be addressed over the next few months.

And, while you’re thinking of your next great question, check out my website at www.Myriad-PSI.com. Look around, and see if it stimulates a thought. Then let us know.  Thanks for reading this blog…☺

Warmly,
Brian